He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Randomize