Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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