Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
