we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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