Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
