I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
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