Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
