HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
