im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
