tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
