i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
