pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
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