Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
