Yo dont text me then not text me
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize
