I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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