Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Randomize
