So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
