This is not my ceiling
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
