Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Randomize
