If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
There was a lot of him and a little penis
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
