listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
