You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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