guys are only as good as the porn they watch
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Randomize
