So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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