Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
