is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
