Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
