I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Randomize
