are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
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