if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize