I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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