ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
