Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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