All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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