If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize
