its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
