your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
