Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
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