ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
