i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
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