Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
