I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize