quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
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