I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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