She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
He felt like a one man threesome
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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