It's like God shit irony all over that family
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
