a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
