Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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