who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
