if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
