So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize